Sunder

I'll be taking some time off... Some serious personal issues have cropped up and I hope I'll have the courage and maturity to deal with them...

Why, must I be only seventeen to be facing such adult issues? My only pillar of hope has collapsed upon me... Crying. What if I'm forced to deal with matters beyond the scope of a seventeen-year-old? I cannot even begin to comprehend it. When someone still needs support and completeness, something comes up and destroys the greatest fairy tale of them all. What if he tells her he'll be leaving her? I cannot be torn apart or disintegrated. Everything around me is whirling now, crumbling.

Even as I write this, I am clinging to any remaining vestiges of my sanity. I try to turn to faith. Yet who is there to answer my desperate calls if I'm a non-believer? Please save me and everything around me from sundering apart. Some things cannot be mended.

No, I'm not out of love. Yet two people very dear to me are. Thus I must have the courage to intervene. I must tell myself I have the maturity to handle this the way it should be.

Please don't leave me.