Confrontation

I just realised how vulnerable I am. What a profound impact the outside world has on me! Ever since I snapped, I have transformed. I sensed a shift in personality. I was once shy, secretive, and tried to be as nice as I can to everybody. Somehow, things changed. I feel the emergence of the menacing side of me. My raw emotions are slowly beginning to surface. I begin to feel hatred. I cannot control myself. It is true I disliked alot of things, many people in the past. But never have I felt true hatred for them. (Okay, maybe I have before) But to let my dislike for certain people and things show so openly is not what I have done (often) in the past. I tended to conceal my emotions.

Yet now, after all the disrespect and disregard I get, I snap. It's NOT just me, but others who also suffered in silence. I'll have to confront with what all I have harbored within for so long. An explosion.

It's true that I do not have many friends. That may be due to the fact that I am slow to make friends. Then again I am slower to forget them. The polar opposite is also true: I am slow to hate, but even slower to forget hatred. For what seemed like an eternity I have waged an inner conflict within myself. Yet it is not something within me that pushed me to the limits.

IT IS TRUE! I AM AT THE EDGE OF A CLIFF! DON'T PUSH ME FURTHER! (Of course, people don't listen, they never do. What I speak here is not for them to hear anyways.) It's a vicious cycle of its kind.